I was going to start out saying I had a melancholy day, until I looked up the definition it in the dictionary. I definitely did not have a melancholy day because it was not depression or darkness that was in my thoughts, so I guess it was more of a pensive day. I am unsure if this day of reflection is due to just coming off of days of meditation and energy work to shorten the length of the flu bug that inhabited my body for a few days, or maybe I am pensive because it is the anniversary of my dad’s death. Maybe it was looking out the window to the freshly falling snow. Whatever the reason, I began my day in pensive thought, I spent my afternoon listening to meditations, and my evening pulling it all together.
I came across this picture the other day and I was drawn to the smiling gaze of my dad’s and my gaze into each other’s eyes… the genuine smiles arising from the love in our hearts.
My dad had such a bright spirit in his younger days. He was everyone’s best friend and loved to laugh. He adored me and I adored him. My dad loved me unconditionally… always. True unconditional love – the kind of love that when I entered a room, his gaze would touch the depths of my soul, telling me that I am so loved. He left this world 28 years ago at only 68 years old. This charismatic man left this earth with no fanfare, no complaints, no drama… he left on his own terms, quickly and quietly.
28 years and long periods of time will go by and I do not think of my dad. The most influential man in my life, and I do not always remember him… I do not grieve him. I know he is free and unencumbered and I have no need to grieve him because I know he is always with me. I don’t need to feel him… I do not need “signs” (even though he does throw two-bits every so often as a special way to say hi).
I connect with my dad just by quieting my mind and remembering him… it is like a call and response system – I call out by thinking of him, and he responds ever so gently, filling me with a “knowing” that he is by my side.
In times of grief, we are engulfed with sadness because we can no longer use the senses of touch or sight on a physical body. It is when we can move to another level of senses arising from our mind’s eye, and the “feeling” of energy, that we can begin to find healing.
I call it FAITH – Finding Awesome Inspiration To Heal
When we can quiet our mind and make a specific request like “Dad, I would love to connect with you today”, the senses become alive, allowing us to join the energy of our loved ones who have left this physical plane.
I also use meditative writing and in January, I had been meditating and burning incense. The following writing came to me and I realized that it was a message about life and death:
Incense burning ever so gently. The flame quickly moves to a beautiful glow that doesn’t extinguish until there is no more Sandalwood to burn…The smoke rises without force – swaying and moving like a gentle dance. A dance with the heart… with the spirit.
The innocent glow of the stick as it becomes smaller and smaller – giving off greater and greater fragrance to envelop the room.Our light does not need to be in flames. Our light is as powerful as the gentle glow that gives off great fragrance, clearing the air of negativity or challenges to one of pure essence.
Breathe gently – allow your flame to move to a beautiful everlasting glow that transforms constantly. A glow to help others find their path. A gentle rising of energy that leaves a fragrant beauty, that is ever so slight, to clear the smoke of that which is no longer needed.
When your light has completed its purpose on this plane, the transformed energy moves gently up into the universe – never gone, just merely leaving its fragrance as a comforting memory…
If you or a loved one are finding yourself struggling with connecting with your loved one who has transitioned from this life, or if you are feeling “stuck” in grief, please contact me at: to set up a time to connect and see how we could work together to help you find the joy and purpose that you are so deserving of.