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“The way you help heal the world is you start with your own family” ~Mother Teresa~
My husband sent me a text with the above picture attached to it. It honestly brought tears to my eyes as I reflected back on our twenty-three years together as a family…
My husband Ken and I met after each having gone through a divorce. For those of you who have never experienced the pain of divorce, just know that the decision is never done lightly. When the divorce papers are signed, a piece of you dies… the piece that held the dreams of living a life filled with love, memory making and growing old together.
As a single parent of a four-year old child, I was adamant that I was never going to marry again… NEVER… remember the old adage “never say never”…?
Ken and I began our relationship when our kids where just little peanuts ranging in age from 4 to 6. Now those same kids are 27, 28 and soon to be 29. We have one beautiful grand-daughter and another grand-baby in the womb. We are a blended family but we do not view ourselves as blended… we just view ourselves as family… pure and simple.
However, our life as a family has not always been pure and simple. We had our share of anger, fear and sadness. We also have had our share of joy and laughter. We went through some of the most painful experiences any family could go through… illness, death, addictions… and we have gone through some of the most beautiful experiences any family could go through… graduations, weddings and a growing family.
As Mother Teresa’s quote states, we need to start healing within our own families before we can heal the world and here are a few ways that my family has helped me heal so that I can help heal others:
- I have learned to heal the pain of old wounds. I was able to forgive my kids’ other parents for past injustices. I have always believed that children have the absolute right to love their parents and in order for me to model that, I needed to forgive and let go of any resentments that I may have held for those other parents.
- I have learned to accept others beliefs without judgement. My family and I do not always see eye to eye on our beliefs. My husband and one son are the epitome of true conservatives… they are very definite in their political opinions which do not necessarily align with my views. It is okay though because I believe we need diversity to create change in the world.
- I have learned to love unconditionally. Loving unconditionally does not mean that we never disagree or that we never get upset with one another. Loving unconditionally means that no matter how angry or hurt we may get with one another, we move through it… we forgive… we make adjustments in our behaviors… and most importantly we do not hang on to the past.
My family has taught me to be a better person. They have taught me to be more forgiving of others… they have taught me to embrace diversity within our world… they have given me unconditional love and support so that I can pay it forward by sharing comfort, peace and joy with others.
What has your family taught you?
Assess. Adjust. Commit. Transform.
Are you ready to A.A.C.T. Today?
Visit my website at: www.patcoach.com or contact me at 952-210-3767 if you are interested in learning how coaching can help you reach your goals.